Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.
I came across this quote a few weeks ago, it sums up nicely what I’ve thought for a long time. If someone else annoys us it’s because something about them reminds us of ourselves. After being with a particularly annoying person, I decided to combine Jung’s insight with EFT to see if I could do something about my annoyance levels with this person.
This is what I did, you might like to try this little experiment for yourselves. I made a list of people who annoy me in some way. (The names and irritations have been changed to protect the innocent)
- Bob is too ingratiating it gives me the creeps
- Mavis is very critical of my ideas
- Bethany whines far more that a six year old should
- Geoff dithers too much
- Maggie prattles on
I assumed that Jung is right and that every ‘external’ irritation says something about me. So I substituted myself in the list and created the appropriate EFT setup statements for a few rounds of tapping as if I was the one with annoying habit.
- Even though I’m too ingratiating I’m alright I’m OK!
- Even though I’m very critical of my ideas I’m alright I’m OK!
- Even though I whine I’m alright I’m OK!
- Even though I dither too much I’m alright I’m OK!
- Even though I prattle on I’m alright I’m OK!
It’s a funny thing since I did these rounds of tapping Bethany’s whining doesn’t seem to be quite so bothersome and Geoff’s dithering is just something he does. I seem to have lost the inclination to be annoyed with them, which is good for me and probably quite good for them.
Taking the idea of tapping on irritations as if they were your own to it’s logical conclusion: every irritating person you ever encounter is bringing you a gift, the opportunity clear up that quality in yourself and be that much more at ease with the world.
P.S. If the person is really annoying or difficult in some way, you might like to try this approach.