A central tenet of EFT / Tapping is that most of our emotional problems have a history. We learn unhelpful feelings and limiting beliefs in situations that are embedded in our memory and play out in our current lives, long after the original experience is over.
One of an EFT Practitioner’s jobs is finding and neutralising the memories of where problems start, thus neutralising the unhelpful feelings that came out of that experience.
There are lots of ways to identify these formative memories.
Practitioners may ask their clients:
What does this remind you of?
When did this problem start?
These are all good questions, and I’d like to introduce you to a sequence of three questions that are an easy and effective way of finding the ‘original memory’ of that feeling.
It’s a wide road and you are the only car on the road.
This road is very strange.
On one side there is a raging forest fire that reaches right up to the edge, on the other there is a deep cold lake covered by a thin layer of ice.
Your car is also very strange.
You can turn the wheel to steer the car but it also has a special feature where the wheel will turn itself when you feel emotional distress. It will turn left or right (you’re never sure which) and the stronger the distress the further the wheel will turn.
You have to drive along this road you have no choice.
If you are on any of the alternative / complementary therapy self-help groups you will be familiar with ‘Therapy By Facebook’: one of the group asks for help and other group members offer their experience and suggestions.
On the face of it, the support and willingness to help from the participants of these groups is is inspiring, but is it a good thing?
The steps of ‘Therapy By Facebook’ are probably familiar to you.
Someone posts a request for help on their favourite Facebook EFT, NLP, ( insert favourite modality here) group.
Note: In this article I’m going to talk about EFT/Tapping, as it is the modality I’m most familiar with, but I’m sure the same kind of thing goes on in many Facebook groups.
It’s obvious that the person making the post is suffering and wants some way to relieve their distress. They may have read articles or seen YouTube videos of someone using EFT/Tapping to get astounding results and they hope that they can get some relief from what is bothering them.
The ‘client’ usually sums up their problem in a short post of just two or three sentences.
As soon as members of the group have read this, some of them are moved to offer whatever help they can. Each person offers a suggestion, an approach or an explanation for what they think is happening and what might help.
Typically these suggestions are also just two or three sentences long.
Typically some of these suggestions will contradict each other.
It may have taken a lot of courage for the ‘client’ to put their issue out there into the public arena. As the suggestions roll in it must be comforting to realise that so many people want to help.
But will the help that is being offered really help?