Tapping: When You Don’t Know The Right Words IKEA Can Help!

IKEAOne of the questions most often asked by people who are new to tapping is “What words do I use?”.

This is an understandable question, but it’s not a very useful one.

Newcomers are often dazzled by the linguistic abilities of their tapping teachers.

It may look like what you say is fundamental to success in EFT, but the words you use might be the least important part of the EFT protocol.

Tapping expert Gene Monterastelli elegantly describes the EFT process as:

Stimulation (tapping) plus Attention leads to Relief.

The words are there to direct you or your client’s attention to what needs to be soothed, it’s the tapping that does the work.

If you are still convinced that you need to find the exact words to get good tapping results I’d like to invite you to try this little experiment.

All you will need is a feeling and an IKEA catalogue or access to their website.

Read moreTapping: When You Don’t Know The Right Words IKEA Can Help!

15 Reasons To Avoid Tapping Scripts

Tapping scriptsIf you search for ” EFT / Tapping + ‘your problem’ ” on the Internet it won’t take you long to find some tapping scripts.

On the face of it tapping scripts are a bargain.

Just find a script that fits ‘your problem’, tap along and ‘your problem’ will be solved.

A tapping script is a list of phrases created by someone who is trying to cover all the possible aspects that they can think of with their idea of ‘your problem’.

All you have to do is tap along with the script / audio / video.

It’s easy, the author takes you where they think you need to go, all you have to do is follow along.

Unfortunately it’s not so simple (or useful).

Read more15 Reasons To Avoid Tapping Scripts

Tapping In The 3rd Person For Better Self-Help

In the 3rd person
Image courtesy of Andrea

Tapping/EFT is an excellent self-help tool. It’s a simple way to soothe emotional stress and remove personal difficulties.

All you need to do is notice what is going on in your thoughts and feelings, then direct your tapping to soothe those troublesome memories, emotions or beliefs.

Using EFT on memories, emotions or beliefs can be quite straightforward, especially if you know what to tap on.

But sometimes it can be difficult to use tapping for self-help, because it can be hard to tap for ourselves, while we are in the middle of what we are tapping on.

Working on your own stuff can be difficult because:

  • When you are on the inside of the problem you are affected by the feelings and emotions of that problem. If the problem is upsetting or scary you will be upset or scared. It’s difficult to do good work if you are feeling strong emotions.
  • When you are inside the problem you see the problem through the perspective of the problem, it is as if you are wearing ‘problem goggles’. For example: if the problem is that you think there is nothing you can do to help yourself, that belief will get in the way of working on that belief because you will think there is nothing you can do to help yourself.
  • When you are inside a problem it’s hard to see what’s going on – it’s easier to read the label when you are outside the jar. Being a human is complicated. We are full of contradictory thoughts, feelings and responses, in so much confusion it can be difficult to see what is important. To people on the outside it might be obvious, but when you are on the inside it’s not so clear.

This is why working with another person who can see what you can’t see and guide your tapping accordingly can be so helpful.

A skilled EFT practitioner won’t be feeling what you are feeling, they won’t be wearing your ‘problem goggles’ and from the outside they can sometimes see what is going on in us more clearly.

But, there is never another tapper around when you need one!

What if you could more easily see what needs to be done and more easily work with it?

3rd Person tapping helps you be both on the inside and outside of the problem.

By asking surprisingly simple questions we can work with our stuff as if we were someone else and gain a little extra distance and perspective to help our tapping do the work it needs to do.

So what are these simple questions?

Read moreTapping In The 3rd Person For Better Self-Help

A Simple Tapping Technique To Dissolve Old Shoulds

Tapping Shoulds
Image courtesy of Sookie

Should:
Used to indicate obligation, duty, or correctness, typically when criticising someone’s actions

Are you shoulding on yourself?

Are you telling yourself all day, every day, what you should be doing (and feeling bad about what you haven’t done)?

Sometimes we have so many ‘shoulds’ it’s difficult to know what we want.

Have you noticed that even though ‘shoulds’ are supposed to be motivating, what you should do often doesn’t get done!

As the definition says a should is a rule you ‘should’ live up to, a demand you ‘should’ meet, an expectation of how you ‘should’ behave.

  • I should lose weight
  • I should be more assertive
  • I should be more patient
  • I should …

Shoulds are often intended to be motivating, to help us do what we want or what is best for us. In theory our ‘shoulds’ should help us get things done

Unfortunately they don’t usually work that way.

Three ways shoulds don’t work

On the face of it ‘shoulds’ should work, but there are three ways in which they backfire:

Read moreA Simple Tapping Technique To Dissolve Old Shoulds

20 Ways To Squeeze Tapping Into Your Daily Life

“I haven’t got enough time to tap!”

Busy schedule
Image courtesy of flik

Like everything else, tapping takes time. If you have a busy life it can feel as if there isn’t enough time to fit tapping in.

While there may not be time for intensive sessions of EFT in daily life, you can squeeze in soothing rounds of tapping into the many small gaps in your daily schedule.

Some of these tapping opportunities can be in the comfort of your own home, some of them are out and about.

Read more20 Ways To Squeeze Tapping Into Your Daily Life

How One Word Can Make Problems Easier To Deal With

This and that
Image courtesy of Paul Downey

Would you rather have your problems right in your face or at a more manageable distance?

Most people would prefer to have room to breathe and think about their difficulties.

When we think, or talk, about the challenges in our lives we tend to focus on the story of the problem. We get sucked in to the difficulty caught in the swirl of thoughts and feelings about the problem.

But there are two words that can make the difference between being gripped by our problem or being able to hold it at arm’s length.

These words are so familiar that you probably never even notice them.

Read moreHow One Word Can Make Problems Easier To Deal With

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