EFT Cafe – 11th October 2017 – Changing By Changing Your Feelings About Your Feelings.

Chained to a feelingHow do you feel about your feelings?

Humans are complicated (you may have noticed), not only do we have feelings about our circumstances we can have feelings (and thoughts) about our feelings.

If you are resigned to your sadness, anxious about your anxiety or angry at your weakness, etc then the feelings you have are going to be harder deal with.

These ‘meta-emotions’ can keep us stuck in unhelpful and uncomfortable emotional states.

If you feel kind towards your sadness you will have a very different experience that if you feel defeated by it.

Most of the time we just notice how we feel about something, not how we feel (and think) about feeling something, but being able to identify and work with the thoughts and feelings about our feelings can make a big difference to our emotional lives. Changing how we feel about our feelings changes the quality of our experience

In this month’s EFT Cafe, Andy Hunt will present a variety of ways of working with feelings about feelings.

The EFT Cafe is on Wednesday 11th October 2017 at St Oswald’s Hospice Education Centre, Gosforth, Newcastle upon Tyne from 7pm to 9pm and costs just £10

15 Reasons To Avoid Tapping Scripts

Tapping scriptsIf you search for ” EFT / Tapping + ‘your problem’ ” on the Internet it won’t take you long to find some tapping scripts.

On the face of it tapping scripts are a bargain.

Just find a script that fits ‘your problem’, tap along and ‘your problem’ will be solved.

A tapping script is a list of phrases created by someone who is trying to cover all the possible aspects that they can think of with their idea of ‘your problem’.

All you have to do is tap along with the script / audio / video.

It’s easy, the author takes you where they think you need to go, all you have to do is follow along.

Unfortunately it’s not so simple (or useful).

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EFT Café – 13th September 2017 – The Paradoxical Choices Method

Paradoxical ChoicesIf you are familiar with EFT/Tapping you probably know about ‘The Choices Method’ developed by Pat Carrington as a skilful means to bring positive emotions into tapping processes.

In the Choices Method elegantly shifts the tapper from an unhelpful state into something much more positive.

The shift from the negative to the positive is achieved by tapping using the phrase “I choose to [some positive feeling or outcome]” to help access their innate resources.

However if the tapper can choose to feel good, doesn’t that imply that they may have chosen to feel bad in the first place?

Loosely based on the work of NLP Trainer Kevin Creedon and William Glasser M.D. creator of Choice Theory, September’s EFT Cafe is about using the idea that we choose our emotional state (good or bad) to help us let go of the feelings that are troubling us.

Find out about The Paradoxical Choices Method in this month’s EFT Café is on Wednesday 13th September 2017 at St Oswald’s Hospice Education Centre, Gosforth, Newcastle upon Tyne from 7pm to 9pm and costs just £10

Tapping In The 3rd Person For Better Self-Help

In the 3rd person
Image courtesy of Andrea

Tapping/EFT is an excellent self-help tool. It’s a simple way to soothe emotional stress and remove personal difficulties.

All you need to do is notice what is going on in your thoughts and feelings, then direct your tapping to soothe those troublesome memories, emotions or beliefs.

Using EFT on memories, emotions or beliefs can be quite straightforward, especially if you know what to tap on.

But sometimes it can be difficult to use tapping for self-help, because it can be hard to tap for ourselves, while we are in the middle of what we are tapping on.

Working on your own stuff can be difficult because:

  • When you are on the inside of the problem you are affected by the feelings and emotions of that problem. If the problem is upsetting or scary you will be upset or scared. It’s difficult to do good work if you are feeling strong emotions.
  • When you are inside the problem you see the problem through the perspective of the problem, it is as if you are wearing ‘problem goggles’. For example: if the problem is that you think there is nothing you can do to help yourself, that belief will get in the way of working on that belief because you will think there is nothing you can do to help yourself.
  • When you are inside a problem it’s hard to see what’s going on – it’s easier to read the label when you are outside the jar. Being a human is complicated. We are full of contradictory thoughts, feelings and responses, in so much confusion it can be difficult to see what is important. To people on the outside it might be obvious, but when you are on the inside it’s not so clear.

This is why working with another person who can see what you can’t see and guide your tapping accordingly can be so helpful.

A skilled EFT practitioner won’t be feeling what you are feeling, they won’t be wearing your ‘problem goggles’ and from the outside they can sometimes see what is going on in us more clearly.

But, there is never another tapper around when you need one!

What if you could more easily see what needs to be done and more easily work with it?

3rd Person tapping helps you be both on the inside and outside of the problem.

By asking surprisingly simple questions we can work with our stuff as if we were someone else and gain a little extra distance and perspective to help our tapping do the work it needs to do.

So what are these simple questions?

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EFT Café – 14th June 2017 – Tapping In The 3rd Person For Better Self Help

Photo courtesy of Greg Nehring

You probably know that EFT/Tapping is a great technique for working with emotional distress and personal difficulties.

However, sometimes it can be tricky to use as a self-help technique because we are in the middle of what we are tapping on.

When we are on the inside of the problem we may be affected by the emotions of the problem itself and it’s hard to have a clear perspective on the problem when you are in it.

It’s hard to read the label when you are inside the jar.

This is why working with another person can be so helpful. They are on the outside of our distress – they don’t feel it and they can sometimes see what is going on more clearly.

But there is never another tapper around when you need one!

What if you could take a more dispassionate perspective when you are working on your own stuff?

What if you could more easily see what needs to be done and more easily work with it?

3rd Person tapping helps you do just that. By asking surprisingly simple questions we can work with ourselves as if we were someone else and gain a little bit of extra distance and perspective to help our tapping do the work it needs to do.

Find out about ‘3rd Person Tapping’ in this month’s EFT Cafe is on Wednesday 14th June 2017 at St Oswald’s Hospice Education Centre, Gosforth, Newcastle upon Tyne from 7pm to 9pm and costs just £10

EFT Café – 10th May 2017 – Process Mapping For Better Tapping

Process Mapping
Photo courtesy of William Warby

It’s easy to think of problems, aggravations and blocks as single things – a blob of ‘negative’ emotion that just needs to be tapped away.

But most of our annoyances and hindrances are  more complicated than that.

What, on the face of it, seems to be solid ‘things’ are more often multi-step processes that get us where we don’t want to be.

This is why general tapping on an annoyance or hindrance can be be slow and difficult, we need a way to be more specific to allow tapping into the mechanism to disrupt it.

In this month’s EFT Café, Andy Hunt will present (with the help of some post it notes) Process Mapping, a step by step way of unpacking annoyances and hindrances that make it easier to direct our tapping to the heart of the problem and make better progress

The EFT Café is on Wednesday 10th May 2017 at St Oswald’s Hospice Education Centre, Gosforth, Newcastle upon Tyne from 7pm to 9pm and costs just £10

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